Tuesday, March 17, 2009

How do you stop working?

I really try and be the best at everything I do, and its more like an addiction more than anything. I try so hard to do what I am suppose to then in some way I give myself too much to do and then become overwhelmed. As I was laying in bed on Sunday thanking Scott for doing the dishes, Laundry (2 loads), cleaning up, folding clothes, yes I can go on lol, I was telling him how I do way to much and do not have time to focus on the little things.

I have my AA already for school, I'm just working on my double major in Child Development/Family Studies and Family Life Education. I then want to get my credentials. I was thinking about getting a certificate in Gerontology, but right now I am volunteering at an Assisted Living and I am sure that is something I do not want to do =)

So my point to this is, my loving husband sat down to have a talk with me. My controlling needs of doing everything, trying to become the bread winner (I know its not possible) and be a wife is not working. He was very kind about me doing too much and not focusing on the important things. I told him that I have to bring in a pay check, he told me no. The more he told me no it was like telling a little kid they can't have candy. I cried and cried because I need to work no question about that. I can not stand to not get a pay check. I need to control my money by saving saving saving. If I do not have my own pay check I can not save and get things that I want lol. I know that sounds selfish, but working is addicting for me. Of course since we have been married for almost a year this month, the baby question came about. I asked him if would mind that we wait until he is 30 (which is only 2 years lol). He said he's not going to be thirty. So now I have to humble myself and realize that I do not have to try so hard to make money and be a bread winner with him. It might sound crazy, but it's going to be the most humbling experience for me. I think more humbling than when I was homeless.

So I need some advise to cope with being a stay at home Mom in the near future =)


Established Feb 2, 2007 said...

Seriously, it was so hard to stop working! I love having my own money, I always had my own from age 12. It was hard to use my "husbands" money, in fact I still have a hard time spending it! But being at home with my kids is the GREATEST thing ever! I couldn't imagine missing a moment of it! Sometimes being with adults and feeling successful sounds so good, but in the end I don't want someone else with my children! They grow too fast. In a way I am now selfish with my kids!!! Don't get me wrong it is an adjustment, but so worth it!!

Melanie said...

I agree with the above comment 100%!! Working was fun, but I absolutely wouldn't give up the job of being a stay-at-home mommy. It is very rewarding!! So...soon, huh?!?! Can't wait!! It's so much fun when new babies join the family!

Palmyra said...

It took some time for me to get adjusted to staying home. But if you look at it in the grand scheme of things, you realize there is no greater calling or more satisfying experience. President David O. McKay promised, “She who rears successfully a family of healthy, beautiful sons and daughters, whose influence will be felt through generations to come, … deserves the highest honor that man can give, and the choicest blessings of God.”
I'm very excited for both of you!

BubbaandM said...

Work is part of a security issue, at least for me. When the time came for me to stay home with Peanut it was a challenge to let go of working. I liked the security of two paychecks and the knowledge that things would change. I have to say that on my last day of work I was really thrilled. The hardest job you will ever love is being a Mommy! Give your hubby a chance to be the provider; have faith that he will.I'm not saying it will be easy but it is so worth it. It is a blessing that you have a husband who is willing to honor his sacred priesthood responsiblity. And besides, we all can't wait for a "guppie" to come to your fam! I love and miss you both!

Michelle said...

I think it's great the Scott wants to/is able provide for you. I hope that when I am in that situation I can stay at home with my kids. Besides, being a mom is a full time job. You might not get paid with money, but you definitely will get paid in hugs and kisses from your kids.

p.s. you guys can always move to Idaho with Jason and I. Scott and Jason can open a branch of Fisher Air (he has a ton of family up there) while the two of us run a bakery. Kids love goodies...right? :)

shira said...

oh christie! you are too cute! i don't have a baby yet, but i can only imagine how fulfilling it will be! i hope all is well!